My Relationship

by B.A.
(Montreal, Canada)

I am a 49 year old woman with a woman partner and no children.

I have difficulties in my relationship and these difficulties are affecting me to the point that I feel that I am stressed and sad and have trouble focusing on anything.

I have gone to therapy, and have gotten help from my friends and I am still having problems.

I am willing to work a lot on myself leave the relationship if needed, stay in it if needed.
I would like some advice on how to feel more comfortable and secure in my current relationship, and how to know what behaviour is appropriate or not. I get so caught up in neediness and emotions that I can't see clearly, and then I deprive my partner (and myself) of the relaxed person I can be. I also can become angry and attacking because I feel insecure, then I feel very bad afterwards. I am trying to change this but it's difficult to let go of old habits and patterns. Little things she says and does make me feel insecure. Sometimes I think she is really off, only to think rationally later on, and realise that my reactions are off! I keep thinking, "if this was the right relationship for me, then this and that should happen" etc. This seems like wrong thinking, but I delude myself. Sometimes I feel very miserable and think I have to end it, and in those times I also think that it is only me creating my own misery, that she is a great partner (and I really believe she is) and I am the one who needs to change.


Is she the right person for me - am I deluding myself? Is it only because of me that I feel miserable sometimes, and how can I feel more secure and comfortable in the relationship if she is?


And the psychic guides answered: She is doing things conscious or unconsciously to trigger a reaction from you. This is a way for you to heal yourself by being confronted by your own in security. You have attracted her into your life to face yourself and she is helping you do it. Yes she has a part to play in this work because you both choose to be together and leaving will not heal the pain and hurts you have. A simple technique for you is to observe when you get upset, is it in the morning, evening. Is it in a specific place the kitchen, living room or bedroom. Is it about a specific subject you are talking about? Once you understand this you know where is your trigger point for your emotional hurts and work not being there at the same time to unblock the energy. The next step is to know you have hurts from a young child that has not been heal and needs to be address.

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